Abstract
M.A.
The aim of this study is to develop a divorce therapy program to support children of divorce. The programme is discussed in an attempt at evaluating whether children of divorced families are being supported in terms of their view of the reality of the situation as well as coping with the divorce. Divorce is described as an idiosyncratic life event that causes confusion and fear for all those involved. The affected child is a victim of these circumstances in that he has no control over the decisions that are made and are forced into a position where he is obliged to accept whatever others decide. The child's fear and needs are being ignored. These children have poor self concepts and experience conflict regarding their family concept. This programme was designed as an attempt at supporting children during these difficult periods and involves a comprehensive therapy. In order to accommodate the withdrawn child, the therapy is presented in the context of a group. The child finds it easier to cope if he realizes that he is not the only one whose parents are going through divorce. The child normally experiences feelings of shyness and embarrassment pertaining to the divorce, and regards himself as an outsider at school, and in his peer group. The child who is able to share his feelings with other children who experiences similar feelings will be able to better cope with his situation. The child often feels guilt and blames himself for the divorce. Such feelings are intensified if the parents fail to inform him about the impending divorce. This program offers the child an opportunity to discuss his feelings with other children, and to realise that he is not the
only child subjected to divorce. Family concept difficulties occur as a result of the changed family circumstances, which difficulties are of such a nature that the child cannot solve same without professional assistance. In certain instances children attempt to solve their unbearable circumstances by fantasizing about the reconciliation of their parents, and the restoration of a normal and happy family life. This despite the fact that their parents are involved in a second marriage. Loyalty conflicts with associated guilt feelings arise due to the fact that children feel torn between their parents, and are of the view that they are obliged to choose between the parents. The ideal is to teach the child coping mechanisms to cope with the divorce and to support the child at this critical stage of his life.